Caring for Aging Parents While Living in a Different State

With more individuals moving away from the areas where they grew up and more seniors preferring to spend their golden years in places with better weather or cheaper cost of living, today’s families are more separated than ever before. As a result, when distant parents begin to exhibit clues that they are no longer able to care for themselves or appropriately handle the tasks of daily life, guaranteeing their continuous well-being can present substantial obstacles for their adult children. If you are dealing with this major problem, the information below can help you better grasp the situation and take proper action.

How Far Is Too Far?

Parents do not have to be hundreds of miles away to be distant. If they live so far away that you can’t simply see them at least once a week, they might as well be in another country.

Much is dependent on how well your loved ones can continue to care for themselves. If they are quite independent and socially active, a weekly call and the infrequent visit may be enough to alleviate your anxieties. However, if they live alone and have medical concerns, the picture drastically changes. Suddenly, you must be ready for anything.

Making a checklist, such as the one below, can give you a much clearer sense of the actions to follow and the types of support you may need.

• Do they require assistance with home tasks such as cooking, shopping, and cleaning?
• Do they require legal counsel or financial assistance?
• Do they require opportunities to interact with others?
• Do your parents require skilled medical assistance right now?
• Do they require assistance with their daily personal care?
• Do they require transportation to doctors’ visits and other appointments?
• Is it necessary for them to make house adjustments such as wheelchair ramps or grab bars?

Get Support and Caregiving Resources

If your loved one has friends or family nearby, you may wish to request their help in keeping an eye on things. The nephew across town or the downstairs neighbor might be able to check in on them once or twice a week to make sure everything is fine.

The local institution of worship is another excellent source of continuing personal support. Perhaps a local preacher or a member of your loved one’s church group might pay them a frequent visit.

Seniors who live alone frequently experience loneliness or a lack of activities to keep them occupied. This is especially true for seniors who have just lost a spouse or a close friend and are now alone. They may benefit from attending a local senior center for some much-needed social engagement, in addition to the assistance of local priests, friends, and family.

If your loved one has recurring medical concerns that must be monitored and require frequent medication, you may need to hire a part-time home health aide who can visit on a regular basis to ensure prescriptions are taken properly and health problems are under control.

The variety of options available to older folks in today’s communities may amaze you. There is assistance available to meet a wide range of concerns and conditions, from senior centers to Meals on Wheels to adult daycare. The United States Administration on Aging provides an Eldercare Locator to assist you to discover these vital services anywhere in the country, many of which are free and have no financial criteria.

When Should You Consider Long-Term Care?

A home health aide or a friendly neighbor may not be enough at times. If your loved one’s health is requiring frequent trips to the emergency department, or if he or she is exhibiting indications of greater confusion, despair, or incapacity to care for himself or herself, it may be time to look for other possibilities outside the home.

Examine these warning signs that your loved one should not be living alone. If you are unable to care for an elderly relative personally and no one else in your family is willing or able to help, don’t feel bad; there are many excellent senior care options accessible to you.

Senior care has developed and evolved in recent years, producing new and better possibilities and modifying to meet a variety of demands – the health of the older adult, his or her mental skills, the need for social engagement, and the capacity of the family to contribute in the care. As a consequence, while the decision to provide long-term care is tough, it may ensure that your loved one is safe, secure, and experiencing life to the fullest.

Here is a quick checklist to help you decide if your loved one requires more support than can be offered at home:

• Are medicines being taken correctly? Overdosing or missing dosages can cause health problems and possibly hospitalization.
• Are your parents eating healthily? Seniors frequently quit cooking, lose pleasure in eating, and even skip meals entirely.
• Is their financial situation in order? Are invoices paid on time, and are key documents organized and easily accessible?
• Is the house in good condition? Is the house nice and clean, are clothing and dishes being washed, and are necessary repairs being completed? Lawns not being mowed, mail stacking up, and garbage not being carried out are all symptoms of problems.
• Are they concerned about their appearance? Personal hygiene problems or wearing the same clothing over and again might indicate a lack or reluctance to keep up with these crucial responsibilities.
• Is driving becoming an issue? Are they able to walk to food shops if they can no longer drive safely, and do they have transportation to doctors’ appointments and other support services?

Getting Ready for Emergencies

Even if your parent is in good health, you should be prepared to react quickly and deal with any result in the case of an emergency. When an emergency strikes, the following measures and legal documents can save a lot of trouble and confusion:

• Copies of your loved one’s medical records, including primary physicians’ names
• Power of Attorney
• Will and Testament
• Medical Powers of Attorney
• Money set up for an emergency flying ticket